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Morgan Tanner

53 POSTS
Morgan "TruthHammer" Tanner, a grizzled vet with a thigh full of shrapnel and a garage full of conspiracy, now fights his deadliest foe: the mainstream media. Armed with a deep suspicion of anything ending in ".gov," he declares, “My scars are my resume.” Between rants on lizard overlords and 5G brain rays, he reminds readers that “real patriots fact-check with their hearts.”
Republican

Nation Faces Black Printer Ink Shortage as Epstein Files Are Released by Current Administration

The Trump Administration has caused a black ink shortage nationwide at the time of the release of the documentation of the infamous Jeffrey Epstein investigation.
Morgan Tanner -
Business

Burger King Rebrands as ‘Burger Queen’ After Royal Fast Food Patron Accused of Visiting Epstein’s Island

The "home of the Whopper" will now have dual meaning after the King of fast food burgers has been accused of illicit behavior on Little St. James, better known as "Epstein Island".
Morgan Tanner -
Republican

Republican Speaker Mike Johnson Says Recent Grindr Scandal at RNC is Fake News While Wiping Semen from Chin

RNC Chairman David Waters says that the Republican representatives forgetting to turn off their Grindr Alerts was the result of the confusing UI of iOS 26.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

Donald Trump Shows Signs of a Stroke, Says Strokes are a Democratic Hoax, Then Blames Biden for His Stroke

Trump's health begins to decline as the President ends a press conference asking if anyone else "smells toast" before demanding his be covered in extra butter.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

9mm Bullet in Critical Condition After Colliding with Conservative Commentator

A 9mm bullet was minding its own business when it inadvertently came into contact with a conservative social media personality.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

President Trump: “Why aren’t you asking the Clintons about Epstein? Bill was there, too!”

Trump's latest late night Truth Social rants seem to incriminate himself as much as President Clinton regarding the alleged attendees on Epstein Island, Little Saint James.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

Trump Says 8 Years as President is “Too Young”, More Attracted to 13 Year Term

President Trump is seen holding a cheap Etsy replica of the Nobel Prize with his face on it while rambling about thirteen-year-olds practically being adults.
Morgan Tanner -
Business

President Trump Caught Cheating at Monopoly, Changes the Rules to Avoid Going to Jail

Trump reportedly swapped out a stack of Action Cards with Jeffrey Epstein's business cards, allowing the player to get of jail in a single turn by committing suicide.
Morgan Tanner -
World

GOP Pushes New Legislation Lowering Age of Consent to 16, “Considerably Lower” in US Territories

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) says the bill will pass ahead of his planned trip to the Virgin Islands in a completely unrelated pre-scheduled vacation.
Morgan Tanner -
123...6Page 1 of 6
Republican

Nation Faces Black Printer Ink Shortage as Epstein Files Are Released by Current Administration

The Trump Administration has caused a black ink shortage nationwide at the time of the release of the documentation of the infamous Jeffrey Epstein investigation.
Morgan Tanner -
Business

Burger King Rebrands as ‘Burger Queen’ After Royal Fast Food Patron Accused of Visiting Epstein’s Island

The "home of the Whopper" will now have dual meaning after the King of fast food burgers has been accused of illicit behavior on Little St. James, better known as "Epstein Island".
Morgan Tanner -
Republican

Republican Speaker Mike Johnson Says Recent Grindr Scandal at RNC is Fake News While Wiping Semen from Chin

RNC Chairman David Waters says that the Republican representatives forgetting to turn off their Grindr Alerts was the result of the confusing UI of iOS 26.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

Donald Trump Shows Signs of a Stroke, Says Strokes are a Democratic Hoax, Then Blames Biden for His Stroke

Trump's health begins to decline as the President ends a press conference asking if anyone else "smells toast" before demanding his be covered in extra butter.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

9mm Bullet in Critical Condition After Colliding with Conservative Commentator

A 9mm bullet was minding its own business when it inadvertently came into contact with a conservative social media personality.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

President Trump: “Why aren’t you asking the Clintons about Epstein? Bill was there, too!”

Trump's latest late night Truth Social rants seem to incriminate himself as much as President Clinton regarding the alleged attendees on Epstein Island, Little Saint James.
Morgan Tanner -
Politics

Trump Says 8 Years as President is “Too Young”, More Attracted to 13 Year Term

President Trump is seen holding a cheap Etsy replica of the Nobel Prize with his face on it while rambling about thirteen-year-olds practically being adults.
Morgan Tanner -
Business

President Trump Caught Cheating at Monopoly, Changes the Rules to Avoid Going to Jail

Trump reportedly swapped out a stack of Action Cards with Jeffrey Epstein's business cards, allowing the player to get of jail in a single turn by committing suicide.
Morgan Tanner -
World

GOP Pushes New Legislation Lowering Age of Consent to 16, “Considerably Lower” in US Territories

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) says the bill will pass ahead of his planned trip to the Virgin Islands in a completely unrelated pre-scheduled vacation.
Morgan Tanner -
123...6Page 1 of 6

Breaking

Burger King Rebrands as ‘Burger Queen’ After Royal Fast Food Patron Accused of Visiting Epstein’s Island

Business 0
The "home of the Whopper" will now have dual meaning after the King of fast food burgers has been accused of illicit behavior on Little St. James, better known as "Epstein Island".

“Five Stars. Would Get Abducted Again,” Says Man Returned By Aliens

Exclusive 0
Trevor Haskins returned after a week with extraterrestrials, calling the whole thing more vacation than abduction. Officials are baffled, neighbors are uneasy, and he’s already hoping for a return trip.

Game to “Boost Morale” While Nation Descends into Chaos

NEWS 0
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the federal government remains closed...

AMC Introduces New “Bedflix Bangers” Featuring Full Beds for Guests Who Can’t Wait to Ruin Movies with Sex

Entertainment 0
AMC revolutionizes moviegoing with new Cine-Suites—plush beds replacing seats—so guests can finally get freaky without fighting an armrest.

DISCLAIMER: This website is a parody and purely satirical. Almost nothing here is true. It’s nearly all made up and should not be taken seriously. Any resemblance to real people and events are either coincidental or hilariously intentional.

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